36 Comments
Sep 5Liked by Piotr Le, Christopher Helling

You’ve outdone yourself Chris. My favorite line “And we already know that SJV is good at completing throws to Auburn players.” This article is a masterclass in throwing shade.

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Not sure how a Cal fan could throw shade. You’re going to get an unearthly ass-kicking and go 0-2 against Auburn. “Woah man! Major shade!” 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Sep 6Liked by Christopher Helling

Enjoyed the article Christopher, was very informative!

Get ready for an ass whooping though

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Saw this posted on an Auburn site. Came to check out your work. Although I don't get down with the Freeze talk, we all have a history and most of us don't want to revisit it, Freeze was forgiven by his family and made his way back to major football, so I won't judge.

You did some serious film study to pull all of those different clips on so many different players. I assume that was very time consuming. Very impressed by the articles content and depth after the HC and QB areas.

The major difference in last year's offense and this year is that Freeze wasn't in charge of his own offense last year and Durkin plays a much heavier run defense in front of an attacking pass rush. This isn't the same attack on either side of the ball and won't see a midnight start time for the players on the field.

Cal did very well in the portal this offseason and I saw an improved line. I just hope to see Ott make it through a game against Auburn after talking all of that smack last year (see Mark Ingram whenever he was at Alabama, talked a lot and didn't play a combined full game during his tenure in college) before exiting. Now, we see that he is probable at best for this game?

Again Mr. Helling, I applaud your work after you were finished with the holier than thou schtick. I look forward to seeing what your post-game article looks like.

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author

We may only lose by 24 points! Or we may barely muster 14 after refs gift us a free touchdown on a bogus PI call. Who is to say?

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Imagine typing all of this only to watch your team get pummeled by 30 points

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author

Refs spotted you 7 points, but let me know when the other 23 points are expected to arrive.

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CALIFORNIA 🤣🤣🤣 trash football program 😭🫵🏼🫵🏼 you may only lose by 24. Maybe! LMFAOOOOOO😂😂😂😂

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Good luck catching this skull fking that's coming.

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author

I tried to catch it, but I guess it was also intercepted by the Cal defense.

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99% sure Jake Curtis was just trolling the Auburn beat writers and stroking their egos with that prediction.

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I hope he’s wrong. But I too didn’t like Wilcox being so coy about the QB leading up to the game vs Davis. Come on it was Davis.

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So I checked, and he's the guy who asked about the starting QB against Davis, and didn't like Wilcox's answer.

Are people really that petty?

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Is it the guy who asked Wilcox what's the advantage of not naming a starter?

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Sep 5·edited Sep 5

yep

that score prediction is next-level petty

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yeah, never seen such from a beat writer.

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he's insane. Or maybe I am. We'll find out on Saturday.

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Christopher Helling, you put the "HELL" in Helling. What a sanctimonious ass you are.

We ALL are hypocrites - even YOU.

You mentioned Matthew 6:1-6 in condemning Freeze, but you should read to the next chapter, Matthew 7:3-5 ,which condemns YOU and the hypocrite you are!

If you were important enough to put your life under a microscope, I'm certain we would find many things that would expose you for

total fraud that you are.

By the way, the Bible is full of stories of flawed men who did terrible things but repented and were forgiven. I have NO DOUBT that even you will need a LOT OF FORGIVENESS. You are really a NASTY, JUDGEMENTAL ASS, but to quote you, "I don't want to regress i to name-calling".

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author

I’ve never really thought about it, but is it definitionally judgmental to call somebody else judgmental?

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author

https://imgur.com/a/4CH4DT8

"If you were important enough to put your life under a microscope, I'm certain we would find many things that would expose you for total fraud that you are."

I swear, these people are always telling on themselves. Yeah, if you put my life under a microscope, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't find a history of lying, cheating, and speed-dialing prostitutes; but you do you, buddy.

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"These people" ? You have a pathetic habit of sterotyping people you don't know.

So you are accusing me of also speed-dialing prostitutes? THAT IS A SCURRILOUS BALD-FACED LIE, SO THAT ALONE PROVES YOU ARE A LIAR, AND I'M CERTAIN IT'S NOT THE ONLY LIE YOU'VE TOLD!!

YOU APPARENTLY ARE SO.PRIDEFUL THAT YOU THINK YOU'VE A IMPECCABLE LIFE OF PERFECTION. OF COURSE, PRIDE IS ONE OF THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS. YOUR STANDARDS ARE NOT GOD'S, WHO MADE IT CLEAR THAT ALL- EVEN POMPOUS SELF-RIGHTEOUS JERKS LIKE YOU- HAVE SINNED AND FALLEN SHORT OF THE GLORY OF GOD. HIS STANDARDS JUDGE ONE GUILTY OF SIN, EVEN IF ONE JUST SINS IN HIS HEART! (OF COURSE, I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF YOU'RE AN ATHEIST AND NONE OF THIS GOD TALK MATTERS TO YOU!)

I INITIALLY WAS SO BOTHERED BY FREEZE'S PAST TRANSGRESSIONS THAT I DIDN'T WANT HIM TO BE HIRED.

BUT THE BIBLE TEACHES FORGIVENESS, AND HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN HAVE FORGIVEN HIM, AND THEY BELIEVE HE HAS TRULY CHANGED, AND THEY KNOW HIM FAR BETTER THAN I, WHO HAVE NEVER MET HIM.

HOWEVER, IF IT IS PROVEN THAT HE IS DECEIVING US I WILL BE FIRST IN LINE TO CALL FOR HIS FIRING.

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author

You just got DEFEATED by WOKE football. Cali-(Commie)-Fornia, with all its DEI players, chipped in as a team and collectively used SOCIALISM to DEFEAT Auburn Football with WOKENESS.

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I don't usually suffer fools, but I'll make an exception in your case.

I find it hilarious that you are unsuccessfully trying to attach political beliefs to a football game!

You are obviously a pathetic obsessed left-wing woke joke socialist/communist wacko.

Unfortunately, your once great state is losing residents by the tens of thousands to other more rational, conservative ,capitalistic , freedom loving , Constitution respecting parts of the country.

Before long there will only be lunatics like you left.

I lived in California for years, and met hundreds of nice people and became good friends with scores of them.

Fortunately, I never came across anyone as hateful and despicable as you.

We won (DEFEATED YOU) the football game

last year. And becuse I ( unlike you) have class and sportsmanship, it never even occured to me to "rub it in".

But I knew you would!

It was a silly little football game. Win some, lose some.

But in the REAL contest between socialism/communism and capitalism , left-wing loonies like you will NEVER win that war!!!

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author

I went back and forth on whether or not to respond because you're obviously not savvy enough to realize when someone is messing with you, but the absolute nerve on you. The fact that you would ever try to act high and mighty here when you came onto a Cal blog in which you are not the target audience, literally opened with a personal attack on the author (amongst the many other personal insults you have continued to throw my way while claiming to be above "name-calling") and then try to act holier than thou is honestly despicable and embarrassing. And for what? Because I'm a fan of a different team than you? Because I restated verifiable facts--such as the fact your coach was once fired for repeatedly contacting prostitutes with his office phone? I'm sure your opinions on his moral failings directly coincide with his performance on the field.

You want to act all high and mighty and pretend you're a good sport "that wouldn't think to rub it in", but maybe try taking a look at the way your compatriots acted on this blog in this comment section. Speaking of obvious hypocrisy, you try to pretend you don't care about a "silly little game" at the same time your compatriots are proclaiming that California doesn't understand what it means to care about college football. You get triggered by an obvious joke reference to "woke football" and "find it hilarious... trying to attach political beliefs to a football game" before going on a multiple paragraph rant about "socialists" and "communists" yourself (along with your fellow Auburn commenters who are so out of touch with reality that California is just an absurd stereotype in your head; you are the very parody I lambasted in last year's article). You dish it out all you want but you apparently can't take it. I gave you back the same energy you gave me. You came to my article and were extremely disrespectful, and are somehow baffled why anyone would turn that disrespect right back at you. You reap what you sow. The constant hypocrisy you displayed here -- trying to quote Bible verses at me while lobbing non-stop personal attacks on me for a perceived slight on your _university's head football coach_. Do you believe yourself to be acting Biblically? Have you conducted yourself in a way consistent with your Christian teachings? Cf: Luke 6:31, Titus 3:2, James 1:26.

I met many fine representatives of your university and state this past weekend, but you and your fellow message board warriors are not among them. You are an embarrassment to your school, your state, and frankly you should be embarrassed with the way you have conducted yourself here.

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I wrote a long response that I hoped you would appreciate, but for some reason it was not delivered. I'm too tired to retype it now. Any idea why it why it didn't get through??

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A lot of copium here, already waving the white flag lmao I love the part where he calls Auburn fans dumb for assuming cal won’t travel as well. There were easily 20k auburn fans at cal last year and you still couldn’t even fill your own stadium.. I was there, probably 10k empty seats. The game tomorrow will have 0 empty seats. Maybe 5k cal fans will be there, and that’s generous. Can’t wait to shut this regard up with a nice little sec beatdown

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You’re probably an atheist anyway so I suspect you wouldn’t understand redemption and forgiveness. Not a lot of those types in Berkeley I’m sure since all indications are the Socialists and Communists rule the roost in your little town. Now I really hope AU beats that arse.

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Chris, our holier than thou made attitude going into the game last year made the loss sting more. You’ve kind of compounded that mistake.

But so in depth and thoughtful as usual

Go Bears!

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Let's get on the field, see who is coached better, and who wants it more. Individual victories, mano al mano, will determine the outcome of the game. I don't care how good their players are, if we physically beat them into submission, we will win. That's how Kyle Whittingham and Utah succeed over and over against teams with superior talent. Time to get nasty Bears and show the SEC the left coast can play physical football with the best of them.

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I don't think we need to see which team is better coached. Hugh Freeze turns teams around. His second year Mississippi team went 8-5, and his second year Liberty team went 10-1. Wilcox not so much. I cannot think of one dominant road victory against a good team that he had produced. I just hope they don't roll with 10-minute quarters in the second half.

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Is the author an example of a Berkeley education? I would assume "Auburn is a color" was written with tongue in cheek, if not for the vitriol of the "writing." I can say with certainty that, despite his claims to the contrary, neither he nor his fellow californians have any concept of what it is to care about college football.

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author

Yes, that was indeed "tongue in cheek", a gold star for you.

But yeah, sure, you guys really showed me what it meant to care about college football, when I saw y'all leaving at the top of the 4th quarter: https://imgur.com/ec3GIpa

SEC football just means more, eh?

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The butthurt is strong in this one. I’m sure the Cal fans will enjoy not having to be worried about getting robbed while wading through homeless people everywhere. Unfortunately, they won’t be happy with the outcome of the game. Prepare thy anus. 45-17 Auburn.

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Great article as ways...and thanks for the SJV clip.....I've actually completely forgotten about him and that interception, even though it happened in front of my section. Well, good luck to the kid.

Also...are some of these comments for real? like are we sure these aren't some parody accounts?

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