37 Comments
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Berkelium97's avatar

My takeaway from this piece is that we should punt on first down and then rely on the defense to score points.

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Piotr Le's avatar

The Cumberland v GTech strat.

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FromCtoShining(Blue)C's avatar

So we become the University of Iowa - Berkeley?

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heyalumnigo's avatar

shorten the game. 3 kneel downs, let the clock run, then punt.

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goldenone's avatar

Pooch kick by Plummer on 3rd down if its 3rd and long

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goldenone's avatar

Heh

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Rollonyoubears111's avatar

Always enjoy reading your columns! It's like watching film in the coaches corner. It's informative and very entertaining.

However...

When they hit the field, I'd like to think Cal will win 17 to 14 with Cal taking an early lead of 10 to 7 in the first half (ND having great field position on a late 2nd quarter possession). Plummer will be sacked more than he'd like. Our O line becomes tired and unable to pick up blitzes, giving Ott no room. Ott's first touchdown is after a swing pass in space where there were trips on the other side. the field goal happens after our defense gives us good field positioning after a bad punt.

ND take the field when the second half begins with 1 explosive run play taking the air out of our Cal sideline, scoring on a floater to their nfl bound TE. The stands of green seem to be with Jesus, thinking they have turned that offensive corner. it's 10 to 14, ND feeling confident, hoping to chew up the clock and hopefully scoring a few more points to put us away.

Cal fails to score points offensively, vying for punts to ND on ensuing possessions.

As the 4th quarter and the game dwindles down, with a 3rd and long deep in their territory, ND decides to throw a floater to their prized TE only to be picked off by our LB hiding in the wings scoring 6 on a 35 yard return.

Guinness will be seen spewing out the mouths of the pious.

Wilcox will be carried on the shoulders of the team.

ND players are looking to enter the transfer portal to other teams, while Cal's recruiting draws in a few 5 stars.

GO BEARS!

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goldenone's avatar

Wilcox and Musgrave are on the record saying Ott's play has been astounding and that he will get more touches against ND.

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harmonpreservationsociety's avatar

“Yeah, we don’t need to study for this one.”

How do you think they ended up at ND in the first place?

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Go Eat A Taco's avatar

Plummer's quick release will be a great asset in this game. Cal will have a tough time scoring but so will ND (if Coach Sirmon pressures their QB from the 1st snap on).

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goldenone's avatar

Here's a Bear Republic Racer 5 IPA, available at your local grocery store in time for the game!

https://bearrepublic.com/products/racer-5-ipa-12oz-12pk-can

Note the walking Bear logo

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goldenone's avatar

I'm not exactly advocating popping open a couple of Beers at 11:30, but you gotta do what you gotta do to support the team.

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diasfordays's avatar

Of course not... Gotta pop them open at 10:30 to be ready for kickoff.

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Tosh2.0's avatar

I am 100% advocating for popping a couple beers at 11:30… after drinking gold drivers all morning to properly prepare for this one.

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OldSoCalBear's avatar

Also Anchor California Lager… unfortunately both have a fair amount of red on the can or bottle

https://www.anchorbrewing.com/mobile/beer/california_lager

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TKE Prytanis 79's avatar

You had/lost me at the Guinness reference....shit...go bears

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O.Overall's avatar

Do I smell Cheez-Its????

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diasfordays's avatar

Oh god no

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BTown85's avatar

So......short passes and hope they miss a tackle? Direct snap to Ott? Maybe I should have taken the under.......

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Daddy's avatar

The thing that makes me worried are plumbers short passes have been really terrible. This could get ugly for the offense.

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Go Eat A Taco's avatar

"plumbers"

Is that really necessary??

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Daddy's avatar

Whoopsie!

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BrooklynBear's avatar

Would a Cal beer be a sour? A sour drinker's sour at that?

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Berkelium97's avatar

Perhaps an incredibly bitter IPA that has just enough character and intrigue that you keep drinking it despite repeatedly asking "why am I doing this to myself?" Probably high ABV too, so you wake up the next morning regretting the entire experience.

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Christopher Helling's avatar

I don't mind sour beers (and The Rare Barrel in Berkeley is fantastic), but no joke, I am unable to taste bitterness. This would also explain why I still love Cal Football IPA.

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diasfordays's avatar

Pitchers of Drake's Triple IPA incoming

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Piotr Le's avatar

Cal would be a Baltic Porter. Bitter, dark, and created in the unyielding climate of Eastern Europe

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bearspot's avatar

Yes, like a Gose.

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bearspot's avatar

ROCKFIGHT!

Final score: 10-5

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ak_A_bear's avatar

Hmm, I see coach Freeman has converted to Catholicism. A victory over Cal must be worth a Mass.

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paulie's avatar

DOOM

Great article, thanks! Go Bears!!

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HaasBear's avatar

Great post, that defense is scary! Can’t wait to experience game day in south bend.

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goldenone's avatar

Seem to have oodles of talent and speed everywhere. I'm thinking Cal gets 2 TD's and a field goal attempt in nine drives. I also hope Plummer can stay upright and avoid injury, but pretty sure we're looking at 5 sacks and numerous hurries.

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heyalumnigo's avatar

FTFY

Cal gets 2 *Defensive* TD's

Hard to see our O getting 2, much less 1 TD based on all those animated GIFs.

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HaasBear's avatar

I’m thinking this might be a cheezit bowl situation, first to 10 wins.

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