62 Comments

Close also counts with claymores, area fire weapons and tactical nukes.

Expand full comment

OUR CRUMBLING DEMOCRACY

Expand full comment

Mint. The. Coin

Expand full comment

Super old person in position of power and in apparent cognitive decline not only refused to resign, but apparently caught a palsy and encephalitis

https://ktla.com/news/california-wire/california-sen-dianne-feinstein-suffering-from-ramsay-hunt-syndrome/

Expand full comment

Super old person in position of power and in apparent cognitive decline refuses to resign. No, not him. No, not her either.

https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2023/05/judge-pauline-newman-sues-cognitive-test.html

Expand full comment

A man protests recent gun legislation by hanging out by a kid's bus stop with an AR-15 and his finger near the trigger. It took me a long time to figure out if he was protesting for or against gun control.

https://www.wbaltv.com/amp/article/man-with-gun-severn-school-bus-stop-anne-arundel-county/43932236

Expand full comment

Next family dinner is going to be AWKWARD!

Expand full comment

Apparently mom immediately divorced him.

Expand full comment

RIP Andy Rourke of the Smiths...

Expand full comment

Yes, too bad, good bassist.

Expand full comment

ELSEWHERE IN COLLEGE

Expand full comment

Lots of Virginia alums near me. You do see refs to the Wahoos, but Cavaliers is more common.

Expand full comment

A group of cows is a herd. A group of crows is a murder. A group of Cal alumni is ________

Expand full comment

Hibernation

Expand full comment

Intelligent, compassionate, witty, wise, charming and able to stand years of punishment while smiling through the pain.

In a single word they are: Oskis

Expand full comment

a depression

Expand full comment

...a support group

Expand full comment

...a fan base

Expand full comment

CLOSE, but....

Expand full comment

Close only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and nuclear bombs.

Expand full comment

TIL (sorta) the phrase "international tolerance" - has something to do with an accepted code for linear dimensions, whatever TF that means.

I am finally in the home stretch of getting this even-moreso-than-Cal-football-hypertension-inducing ADU apartment built in the back yard...the hope is to use it as a short term rental. The final challenge has been the Murphy bed unit I ordered from murphybeds.com up in British Columbia, EH... just have to assemble and hang the upper hutch for more storage, but after a number of hiccups, the bed panel has been built, attached to wall studs and hung on the springs. So, I ordered the mattress, a FULL (standard dimensions 54"x75"), as that's what my model's 54 1/4" x 75 1/4" frame was built for due to size of the room.

Unfortunately, the spring coil, 9.5", non-pillow top mattress that weights < 75 lbs (ALL requirements for the Murphy bed) arrives, and I throw it on the bed frame....and POOF!!...it is exactly 52" wide, thus leaving an unsightly gap of 2.5" that also cause the mattress to move around within the frame...ugh.

So I am now going through the back-n-forth with Mattress Firm re: industry standards and "international tolerance" and how the mattress is close enough, when it's absolutely not for my purposes. Boo.

Expand full comment

G.O.A.T. GANGS

Expand full comment

Well... we weren't the greatest, but my gang was my fave- we never lost, as officer's kids, we beat the Sgt's kid's gang.

Expand full comment

Ha! I'm surprised no questions.

Expand full comment

OK, I'll bite. What the heck are you talking about?

Expand full comment

A gang of three friends + me, age 10-12 (13?) when I lived on a RAF base in England - and we did win a even fight (4 each side) against a Sgt's kid's gang - we were all officer's kids. No weapons. Very silly, but we didn't didn't think so.

Expand full comment

Do the Van Buren Boys belong on this list? I say no...

Expand full comment

DBD AV CLUB

Expand full comment

Mrs. Davis (on Peacock), Damon Lindelof's newest show since Watchmen, wrapped up yesterday. It follows a nun sent on a quest by an omniscient AI to find and destroy the Holy Grail. Tonally it's very similar EEAAO, in that it uses humor and absurdism to tackle parental relationships and existential questions. Very enjoyable limited series that impressively sticks the landing! 18/19 WB

Expand full comment

Lakers run out of steam first. I thought the Lakers were going to get destroyed but they've shown fight. Nuggets have a non-Jokic problem just like the Warriors have a non-Steph problem. Though I think the Nuggets had both he and Jamal Murray out at the same time.

Expand full comment

went to bed in 3rd q thinking the Lakers had it under control. i missed the 3rd q comeback and the hot shooting in the 4th

Expand full comment

Dodgers disinvite the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence on Catholic Appreciation Night [checks notes]. Sorry, Pride Night. They got disinvited from Pride Night because of pressure from Senator Marco Rubio.

https://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/id/37681060/dodgers-disinvite-lgbtqia+-group-pride-night

Expand full comment

Why the hell should LA care about a parched Florida senator?

Expand full comment

Nice callback. I applaud the reference.

Expand full comment

that useless prick

Expand full comment

Oh, come on, now. Don't sugarcoat it!

Expand full comment

Golfer Tom Kim went into the water to find his ball. He ended up in mud. And then he went back in the creek to wash off. And then he went viral and this is his reaction.

https://twitter.com/TommySladek/status/1659582390308683778

Expand full comment

[NHL] Hurricanes lose to Panthers 3-2 with 13 seconds left in quadruple OT. The game ended at 2 am.

https://www.espn.com/nhl/story/_/id/37682307/matthew-tkachuk-scores-4th-ot-panthers-defeat-hurricanes

Expand full comment

Dodger fans, what's up with Julio Urias? Yikes.

Expand full comment

Cardinals home run derby against Julio Urías & Yency Almonte routs Dodgers

https://www.truebluela.com/2023/5/18/23729434/julio-urias-home-runs-cardinals-yency-almonte-dodgers-freddie-freeman-andre-jackson

The Dodgers and Cardinals played one of the weirdest games of this season, as the Cards at one point led by seven, only to see the Dodgers cut the lead to one, but eventually the home team won by eight, a 16-8 triumph for St. Louis.

It was encouraging to see the Dodgers offense chip away at what felt like an insurmountable deficit, but a blowup in the eighth inning at the hands of Yency Almonte, was the dagger, to make this, once again, a blowout win for the Cardinals.

Expand full comment

Maybe tipping his pitches? The HRs were on a hanging change up, a FB center cut, etc. Basically he missed location and they were sitting on them. Even if they knew what was coming, he didn't do himself any favors with pitch location.

Expand full comment

Nope. You miss your spots, Major League hitters are gonna make you pay. And the Cards are swinging hot bats right now.

Expand full comment

UC Regents’ vote creates UC Berkeley’s first college in 50 years

The UC Board of Regents today voted to establish UC Berkeley’s College of Computing, Data Science, and Society (CDSS), the campus’s first new college in more than 50 years.

interestingly, the the data science program that i teach for in the Information School (iSchool) is not part of this. i am sure there is plenty of politics and money at stake. the program i teach in is more of a for-profit program for professional masters degrees.

this new CDSS school is a campus wide initiative to do incorporate data into just about about everything, but at an academic level.

https://news.berkeley.edu/2023/05/18/uc-regents-vote-creates-uc-berkeleys-first-college-in-50-years/

Expand full comment

UC Regents created a working group to explore hiring undocumented students for jobs. Oh boy, here come the lawyers.

https://www.politico.com/news/2023/05/18/university-of-california-considers-hiring-undocumented-students-despite-federal-ban-00097734

Expand full comment

Any chance we get another QB out of the portal still, or is it the Sam Jackson show this fall?

Expand full comment

I don't know, but I would guess probably not since we already got someone out of the portal after Jackson: Ben Finley. Also, QB is not an area of need and you want to preserve NIL for an area of need.

Expand full comment

I indeed hope it is not an area of need!

What do you mean preserve NIL; isn’t the pie there infinite and out school’s control? Or do you mean to refer to scholarships?

Expand full comment

Cal in top 25 in NCAA football portal rankings:

https://www.on3.com/transfer-portal/team-rankings/football/2023/

Expand full comment

And 14th on 247 (doesn't take into account transfers out) https://247sports.com/Season/2023-Football/TransferTeamRankings/

Expand full comment

Can I get a "Go Bears!" on three? One, two three....

Expand full comment

Gob ears!

Wait, that’s Arrested Development.

Expand full comment

Go Be Ars!

Expand full comment

“Go Bears!” on three!

Expand full comment

Three!

Expand full comment