179 Comments

Silly Jokes

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From Physics 5A class: The Pitot Tube was invented by that famous physicist, Professor Tube.

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My wife asked to buy her some stamps, I got a couple flats of Star Wars droids. I handed them to her and said "Here some star wars stamps; I'm sorry but they didn't have any of Jar Jar Binks"

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I guess this would be funnier if you knew she hated Jar-Jar with a passion, even in Clone Wars, where I didn't mind him too much.

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https://twitter.com/Botany_nerd/status/1404890658217865225?s=20

@Botany_nerd: USDA ARS in Maryland is hiring two postdocs, work with Dr. Sunny Luo and Dr. Tianbao Yang.

These labs are great, and are actively involved with a collaboration between NASA and USDA.

Two postings in comments.

First job: USDA, Agricultural Research Service (ARS), Food

Quality Laboratory in Beltsville, Maryland, is seeking a POSTDOCTORAL RESEARCH

ASSOCIATE (Research Plant Physiologist, GS-11) for a TWO-YEAR APPOINTMENT.

Ph.D. in plant molecular biology, biochemistry or plant physiology is required. Salary is

commensurate with experience ($72,750 - $94,581 per annum) plus benefits. Citizenship

restrictions apply.

The incumbent will design and implement experiments to analyze microgreens (young leafy vegetables) growth, quality and phytochemical accumulation after physical or chemical treatments/stresses and underlying gene changes in response to the

stresses.

Knowledge of HPLC, molecular biology or bioinformatics are desirable. Send

application materials and references to Dr. Tianbao Yang, USDA/ARS Food Quality

Laboratory, Bldg. 002, BARC-West, Beltsville, MD 20705 or e-mail to

tianbao.yang@usda.gov.

Here's the other Plant Bio Postdoc position at USDA in Maryland: https://www.zintellect.com/Opportunity/Details/USDA-ARS-2021-0123

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There's a cluster of USDA buildings around there - so there's a very 1920s office building which was probably in the fields that now abuts an IKEA plaza, a sort of a half-assed concrete brutalist library building, and then 1/2 a mile away the George Washington Carver center which looks like just about every other low-rise office building constructed in the 90s. It is a little jarring to go from suburban sprawl to fields for the areas that ARS is still using for crop tests.

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40th anniversary today of the release of Raiders of the Lost Ark (June 15th, 1981)

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I'm sure you've all heard the review where nothing that Indy does in the movie matters. He doesn't stop the Nazis from getting the Ark, and with that, they all melted anyway.

Entertaining nonetheless! ;-)

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It does matter though! He's the one who found out they were digging in the wrong place for the Well of Souls.

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Yeah, so if he hadn’t been there, then nobody woulda found it, right? So if anything, all he did was make it worse. (Although then a couple dozen nazis wouldn’t have been zapped.)

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Plus he gets the ark from whatever weird island they're on and to the US Government for their warehouse (and away from the Nazis who could have come in afterwards to collect)

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Weird island = Gibraltar, right?

Ok, so he’s cleaning up his mess. Since prior to that he led them to the ark (as you said, the nazis were in the wrong place).

But, new thought, if the nazis did collect it afterwards, and hitler did open it, then Boom: more melted nazis!

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That's the secret appeal of Indiana Jones: he's relatable because he's constantly getting himself in trouble, and just BARELY getting out of it.

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Probably my No 1.

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A Chitwood family all-time top 10....

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Phone fun

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Phone adjacent, I lost my apple watch at Anacapa Island yesterday jumping from the boat into the water. Super bummed since it was tucked under my wetsuit, but apparently was jostled loose from the strap upon entering the water. I didn't notice until I was taking off my wetsuit, but it made it 17 months surfing with the same strap with no issues. I guess a $15 strap from Amazon eventually starts to wear out.

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YouTube'd some old Jersky Boys....brought me back to pre-caller id and cell phones when you could actually do that.

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Last night I got a call from myself! It was scam spoof of course. I always knew this was possible, but it felt bizarre to actually see it happen. The recorded message said my account was cancelled (it wasn't), and to press 1 to continue. I hung up immediately.

Did a little online research, and it seems this is even more common than I realized.

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first year I moved back to China I almost got scammed by a "we're the police, and someone has opened a credit card in your name" - but when they couldn't tell me what my English name was, I finally caught on. (My Chinese name has no legal bearing in China - but that's all they had)

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Never had that happen exactly, tons of calls on the cell phone with the same prefix, which have mainly stopped.

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I had it happen a couple months ago. I was confused for a sec then figured out what was going on. Didn't pick it up and there was no message.

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pretty open ended? as in hardware? or amusing things on my phone today ...

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You replied before I could elaborate!

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TCU weekend Rangers game

@JimmyChitwood is the Rangers game Mon night? Looks like United has either a 740 AM flight to SFO for 129 or a 7 PM flight for 119 for Tues.

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do we know anything about getting tix to the football game yet?

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Rangers host the Astros Monday night...bring a trash can to bang! Newellbany and I are flying home Tuesday am..I think mine's at 9 am.

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Cool. I'll get one of these Tues flights.

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Tell the DBD a random Simpson's quote

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Mmmmmmm chutney squishee

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Now do Classical Gas!

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(paraphrase)

Homer: I just bought stock in NewsCorp

Bart: Dad...that's Fox

Homer: oooh, undo, undo, undo

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Lisa needs braces...dental plan

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D'oh! A deer. A female dear.

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Don't have a cow, man.

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Doctor Zaius Doctor Zaius......ooooh Doctor Zaius.

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I hate every ape I see, from chimpan-A to chimpanzee.

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This is the best song lyric ever written

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that's the best line!

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Me fail English? That's unpossible.

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So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time.

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You don't win friends with salad!

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cha cha!

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Did you say science?

No, he said pie pants

mmmm, pie pants

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Help me Jeebus!

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Up and at them!

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My eyes! The goggles do nothing!

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Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean that I don’t understand.

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Aurora Borealis, at this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?!...May I see it?

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I'm taking this baby to Mexico!

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All right, jail break!

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Nebraska

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My business parter is from Omaha and still has a delightful midwestern accent despite being in CA since 1994

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For my parents' 25th anniversary (in like 1984), we did a river cruise from SF to Sacramento. The captain was from Nebraska. He asked folks if they knew what the N on the football helmets stood for. The answer he said was...

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Knowledge

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Maybe I shoulda put this under Silly Jokes instead ;-)

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So how fun is a river cruise from SF to Sacto?

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about what you'd imagine...the first 30 to 40 minutes were cool while you're in the bay, but then there's a few hours of Benicia-to-davis river, which is "slow". then a night/day in old town sacto, which is ok (for a day).

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I grew up in Nebraska and spent most of my 30's there. The rural/urban divide is stark. Omaha and most of Lincoln is democratic/centrist, as evidenced by the 1 electoral vote going Dem the past couple elections. Omaha is a very nice midsized city. Strong economy, getting more diverse by the day, and surprisingly good food and entertainment options for the region.

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I grew up wearing a red Nebraska t-shirt and was a Cornhuskers fan back when I didn't really understand football. My younger brother grew up wearing Michigan t-shirt. Those were souvenirs from my dad who often had business trips to Midwest.

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Have been through twice, once in 2016 driving from Portland to Louisville and again last year driving to Philly. Both times stayed in some little highway town. Did go my Omaha and visit the CWS stadium.

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My pops and I went to Omaha for the Zuber/Luke/Blum/Penix/Clapinski CWS team in '92...what a blast. A visit to the CWS for a game or two is highly recommended for any baseball fan.

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Sadly they went 0-2 and were the first team eliminated that year. I saw them in Omaha in 2011, when they last to Virginia twice while going 1-2. Still a blast to see them play.

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Yes...they led off the whole tournament in Game 1 and let one slip v Charles Johnson's Miami team. Some crafty little Florida State lefty named Davis then handcuffed them 2 days later, but just such a cool experience. I still have the t-shirt!!

That '92 Cal team was stacked...Zuber, Luke, Clapinski, Blum and Cather all made it to the Show, and Troy Penix was a beast himself...just didn't have a position.

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HeyAlumniGo and i went to middle and high school w/ Zuber.

among other accomplishments he did something 100 push up during one of those Presidential fitness tests. he didnt break the school record held by his older sister!

aside from that i saw him play 1B at a minor league game when he was traveling thru Indi.

he had a shot to make the Yankees roster one season if not for having to make room for some guy named Jeter.

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my brother and I - neither of whom are particularly fans of Bruce Springsteen's music - have a running joke that if you can't stop a Springsteen fan from trying to insist that you must have a favorite album, you tell them Nebraska.

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one of the 4 states i have not been to.

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23 states. For my current residence I've visited 17/22 provinces, 4/4 municipalities, 1/4 autonomous regions and 2/2 Special Administrative regions.

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That's a LOT.

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But missing probably like 40% of the country by area (Xinjiang and Tibet and Inner Mongolia are gigantic)

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Also Qinghai

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It's worth a trip to Henry Doorly Zoo in Omaha, IMO a better place to visit than the San Diego Zoo.

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AB alert!!

Also if it's better than the SD Zoo then surely it's better than the Columbus Zoo!! tbb alert!

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Those 3 are always at the top of the 'Best Zoo' lists. I have not been to the Columbus Zoo, but I have been to Omaha and San Diego. Omaha has much better use of the space, and has a couple features San Diego does not have(kingdom of the night, the desert dome, indoor rainforest). San Diego.....has pandas.

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Also: It's in San Diego.

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That's a plus. Balboa Park and Ocean Blvd. are awesome

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Back in the mid 90's, I needed a get away change of pace from field work in AK. Got a cheap flight to Denver, rented a car and decided to visit Lincoln, having never been there. It was late September and the Huskers were playing away....the campus was dead but enjoyed walking around. Saw the movie Twister in a theater where it had been playing for months.

What struck me though, was going into a few bookstores, and seeing a dedicated table in each with stacks of a book by some UN football coach, the name escapes me, and was told they sell bunches of them.

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I'm guessing the coach was Tom Osborne. He was very successful there and later was elected to Congress. I still have some relatives in Nebraska and I ended up unfriending a couple of them on FB because I couldn't stand the right-wing garbage they posted.

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Yup, Osborne has been deified. He and Bob Devaney have both achieved sainthood in Nebraska.

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DBD AV Club

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At least a few times over the last 3 weeks I've moved a 2nd TV below the main one and had the Dodgers game on one and an NBA game on another.

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I set up the Apple 4K TV last night - it's remarkably improved. Watched an 3rd season episode of The Bureau and the finale of Fleabag - both great shows.

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Sonos

i have the play bar, the subwoofer, and the old "connect" device that allows me to hook up my traditional stereo equipment like the CD carousel i bought junior year at Cal.

(it is entirely a separate miracle that it still works 30+ yrs later)

does anyone have the "new Sonos connect device"? i have heard that the sound is supposed to be better and some more recent Bluetooth features, but also some drawbacks.

i even have an "upgrade discount coupon" but have not pulled the trigger on it

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I'm not sure what exactly your set up is... I have 7.1 surround set up, but no subwoofer since I live on the third floor with people living underneath me.

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DBD Gym

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Tried ONE, just ONE sit-up last night, made back pain flare up, couldn't even do bridges without pain. BOOOO!

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Week three of the 8wk workout plan, no weight loss, but feeling a lot stronger and more comfortable with the exercises.

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my weightlifting class is working on front squats and man my wrist mobility is garbage. So the weights aren't the issue, but I'm lifting a lot lighter than I do comparatively (like normally I'm in the 40% range with the guys, but right now I'm at the 80% range with the women because I can't get the front rack position right

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Wife signed us up for cross fit. I'll report back on Thursday if I'm still alive

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from yesterday sounds like she should sign her dad up...

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They are building a home for the brother in law and the FIL/MIL. BIL planned for a nice home gym. FIL is still befuddled as to why a gym is even necessary.

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nice knowing you ...

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Rode with my cycle club this morning - they've split the Tuesday ride into 3 paces, 40+, 35-40, and then 28-32. I rode with the slow pace, but at the end sprint, I was very far behind despite pushing 38 for 1km. I think everyone was sandbagging it in the slow group.

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impressive. these are pretty fast paces overall, even for slow group.

on the other hand it seems that your rides are pretty flat. i average 24-28 kph around here on moderately hilly roads.

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There are no hills in Shanghai!

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DVD Test Kitchen

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Over the weekend I made homemade biscuits and tried a gravy recipe. MMMM. So good. And didn't seem as filling as gravy from a restaurant. Not sure if restaurant gravy is cream or whole milk based but maybe it's because the recipe I used is whole milk based. Or because I got the breakfast sausage from Lunardi's instead of Jimmy Deans. Maybe the sausage I got is homemade so doesn't taste as heavy. Dunno but it was really good.

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we occasionally make it at home but lately i have been having at this fancy diner. Bubby's in NYC, famous for their cherry pie.

Biscuits & Hatch Chili Sausage Gravy

couldnt find link, doesnt seem to be on current online menu

https://www.bubbys.com/

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chilaquiles ...

i was in the mood for them yesterday for breakfast but didnt have much time.

threw together some shredded chicken, fresh salsa and some tortilla chips w/ a scrambled egg and it was delicious and satisfying.

eggs are not usually part of it though, right?

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Every chilaquiles dish I've ever ordered has come with eggs, but sometimes the eggs weren't integrated into the toritilla/sauce mixture.

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I’ve always seen the eggs and chips mixed together, and I’ve always made it that way, but see my entry below for what Wikipedia thinks

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Turns out “what do I know”

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chilaquiles?wprov=sfti1

I’ve never seen them without eggs (and just got back from Mexico,so feeling cocky about the topic!)

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btw, we were at brunch with in-laws (brother's wife's fam) about 10 years ago. mom is from Ecuador (dad is british). Son ordered chi-lack-wih-liz. turned out he didn't know what they were, didn't like them, so I traded my Florentine Benedict for them...

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One of the teachers I taught with when I first moved to China was from rural Canada, and she legit thought they were pronounced "tor-till-uhs"

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I think eggs are a required ingredient (with the topopos...and salsa to soften them)

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We usually have a few eggs in ours, usually over easy eggs though.

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i looked at myself a little funny when i put in the scrambled eggs and it did not quite have the right texture or consistency

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Our Crumbling Democracy

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Trump endorses Budd, not Pat McCrory or Mark Walker in NC Senate race. Behold, the power of a Trump endorsement.

"[A recent] survey showed McCrory leading Budd 45 percent to 19 percent, with Walker trailing in third at 12 percent support. When respondents were told that Trump had endorsed Budd, his support surged to 46 percent, while McCrory’s shrank to 27 percent and Walker’s to 8 percent."

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totally not a cult though

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This Congress' session is already nearly 25% done. They need to get busy with some legislative wins if they want to have a chance at holding the House and Senate after the '22 elections. The COVID relief bill will be a distant memory by then.

Also, Mitch McConnell is a stain on this democracy.

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of course he does, the dirty fucker

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Trump, Mark Meadows, and Giuliani tried to get the DOJ to officially back that the election was stolen. Meadows pushed the idea that Italian satellites were able to change election machine votes. Fucking traitors.

https://www.cnn.com/2021/06/15/politics/trump-allies-emails-justice-department-2020-election/index.html

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Texas power grid operator urges residents to save power due to forced outages

https://twitter.com/tedcruz/status/1296134869320380419

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Quick, shut down all flights from Texas to Cancun

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Today in Covid 19

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Walked down Union Street this afternoon and it appeared that all the shops but one are still requiring masks for everyone.

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We are going back to full capacity on our vessels and only requiring masks for folks that are unvaccinated

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Do you ask to see Vac-cards?

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Are things opening in practice? DC has been open but Smithsonian and many of the museums are keeping limits for now.

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Let's gooooo

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got a haircut yesterday, no mask for the first time since before times.

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also just walked about grocery store w/o mask today for first time.

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Pro

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Runner Shelby Houlihan banned 4 years after testing positive for anabolic steroid, blames burrito

https://sports.yahoo.com/runner-shelby-houlihan-banned-after-testing-positive-steroid-blames-burrito-olympics-team-usa-015346910.html

The runner is an ASU alum and younger sister of recent Cal Cross Country head coach Shayla Houlihan (who was replaced when Robyne Johnson was hired as the new Track and Field director after Tony Sandoval retired). It's easy to cynical about the excuse, but it is plausible to get such a trace amount of steroid from contaminated meat.

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I'm interested in the burrito

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me too. Where can you buy it?

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Beaverton, apparently.

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MLB players caught using foreign substances on balls to be ejected, suspended for 10 games

https://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/id/31637665/mlb-players-caught-altering-balls-ejected-suspended-10-games

Pitchers will be ejected and suspended for 10 games for using illegal foreign substances to doctor baseballs in a crackdown by Major League Baseball that will start Monday.

The commissioner's office, responding to record strikeouts and a league batting average at a more than half-century low, said Tuesday that major and minor league umpires will start regular checks of all pitchers, even if opposing managers don't request inspections.

Repeat offenders will receive progressive discipline, and teams and club employees will be subject to discipline for failure to comply.

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Judging from the change in spin rate, maybe some of the pitchers have already stop using the really really sticky stuff, but it would be interesting to see (might only be possible for people at the games) just how much more umpires will be checking players and balls between innings starting next week.

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I think Trevor Bauer's spin rate has gone down 200 rpm the last couple of starts. Coincidentally he's struggled a little bit.

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Ranking NFL's top 10 quarterbacks of 2021: Patrick Mahomes No. 1; Matt Ryan, Matthew Stafford miss the cut

https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/ranking-nfls-top-10-quarterbacks-of-2021-patrick-mahomes-no-1-matt-ryan-matthew-stafford-miss-the-cut/

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See the Cal section...

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Other College

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SC won a national championship for women's track and field, almost immediately afterward the coach announced that she was resigning and going to UGA. Great.

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Dixie State's naming committee puts forward "Utah Polytechnic State University".

https://www.ksl.com/article/50185851

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Cal

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Go Bears!!!

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dammit...I misread this as Pro

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Go Bears!

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Hawks beat the 76ers, 103-100.

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I felt bad for Embiid. He looked worn out in the fourth quarter. That knee may be bothering him again.

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Clippers beat the Jazz, 118-104.

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I'm shocked the Clippers tied the series up.

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it is much more exciting when they are down 3-1 in the series

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Game #68: A’s early lead holds up against Angels

https://www.athleticsnation.com/2021/6/14/22534509/oakland-as-game-68-los-angeles-angels-score-result

After three innings it appeared the Oakland A’s might be on the way to a blowout victory, but by the end their bullpen was wrapping up a save.

The A’s held on to beat the Los Angeles Angels on Monday in their series opener at the Coliseum, but it got closer than expected after a big early lead. Oakland jumped out to a seven-run advantage, but finished with an 8-5 win that saw the Halos bring the tying run to the plate.

The Angels put up the first run of the game with a solo homer in the 2nd inning, and the A’s responded in the bottom half with a dinger of their own. However, Sean Murphy hit his with a runner on base, so Oakland pulled ahead 2-1.

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fuckin Burch almost blew that one

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The bullpen meltdowns are worrisome.

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Would you believe me if I told you the Giants scored some runs?

https://www.mccoveychronicles.com/2021/6/14/22534465/san-francisco-giants-diamondbacks-recap-brandon-crawford

You’ve heard this stat before, so I’m going to tell it to you again. That’s what we in the industry call the “hammering it home” effect, which is a term I definitely didn’t just make up.

In their four-game series with the Washington Nationals, the Giants scored three runs. Three. One of them was gifted to them by a horrific rule that no one likes. In terms of runs they actually generated from scratch, as a baseball team is supposed to do, they had two in four games and 33 innings.

I mentioned in my preview of their four-game series with the Arizona Diamondbacks that Arizona is dead last in ERA in the Majors, and maybe that could help.

It turns out that helps.

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I don't follow the Giants but was surprised by their offense here in DC. Scherzer went out with a groin issue after twelve pitches and the other games were started by two bottom of the rotation guys and a call-up. Based on their record I assumed the Giants had more offense.

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They typically do have more offense . . . the Nats series was a weird outlier. Or maybe a harbinger.

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Giants fans hope its the former, and fear the latter.

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For Giants fans, this season is already found money.

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Even with all that, an even semi-competent offense would've scored 7-8 runs yesterday. Gotta hand it to them...they're grinders.

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Dodgers’ three hits are enough in win over Phillies

https://www.truebluela.com/2021/6/14/22534478/los-angeles-dodgers-mlb-news-chris-taylor-will-smith

The Dodgers recorded only three hits on the night. Luckily for them, that was more than enough. Will Smith and Chris Taylor each hit a home run, as LA took down the Phillies, 3-1.

Through the first 3 2⁄3 innings, the Dodgers had failed to record a hit off Spencer Howard. Mookie Betts walked to begin the inning, but the offense hadn’t been able to do anything up to that point. With two outs, Smith stepped up to the plate. On a 2-1 count, Smith connected on a fastball and sent it into the left field bleachers, putting the Dodgers ahead, 2-1. They wouldn’t look back the rest of the way.

An inning later, Taylor hit a solo homer to put the Dodgers up 3-1. Oh, by the way... MAKE SURE TO VOTE FOR YOUR DODGERS PLAYERS AND GET THEM INTO THE ALL-STAR GAME!

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GBBR

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GBBR x2 with the win tonight.

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I have my own version of "Twist". I picked my family-law lawyer because she is a UC Berkeley alumna. After we met yesterday to sign name-change documents, we chatted a bit and exchanged "GO BEARS" at the end of our meeting.

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does your version of Twist wear jorts and have a lot of body hair?

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